Once a Medic
Faculdade de Medicina, Universidade de Coimbra, Coimbra, Portugal
My name is Isabella. I am a doctor. I qualified in Ireland in 2020 and worked in the HSE for 14 months and 2 weeks. I then left my medical career in search of something, anything that would make me happier. That was in July of 2021.
I want to tell you about how I came to the decision to leave medicine, what I did in the immediate aftermath, and what I’m doing now. I’m nowhere near figuring it out, but I am so much happier for having left medicine, and perhaps I can offer you some hope or direction or even just an interesting read.
This blog isn’t just for doctors: if you’re in healthcare or any prestigious career and second-guessing your choices, feeling burnt-out or unhappy in your job, you will relate to what I share.
I don’t intend to convince you to leave medicine. Actually, I have great admiration for every healthcare professional who continues in this industry - I admire their resilience, their energy, and their perseverance. If you’re on the fence, you might find that you don’t identify with my story - maybe you are not ready or you don’t want to leave at all. That is just fine, more than fine - it’s really great!
However, I know how it feels when you have those terrifying and recurring thoughts: “I don’t want to be here,” “I am not happy in this job,” “I don’t want to go in tomorrow.” Perhaps the worst of all: “maybe this just isn’t for me.” I know what that self-doubt surmounts to. I know how crippling the anxiety around even the faintest notion of leaving medicine can be. It is hard to broach the subject with peers or superiors in our field, because “it’s just part of the job, it gets easier.” There is always the question: “what if they think I’m not good enough because I brought this up?” It’s a competitive field, and we are constantly trying to demonstrate our knowledge, our skill, our worth. What if, when you say to another doctor, “I don’t think this job is suited to me,” they hear, “I don’t believe I’m suited to this job.” Those are two very different things.
I have a recurring thought even today: that my peers, when they find out I’ve left medicine, believe I’ve left because I wasn’t cut out for the job. This thought makes my stomach churn every time. Wherever you are in your medical career, I want you to remember this: You got through n number of years of medical school/ you graduated/ you are working as a doctor. You absolutely can and are doing this! If you want to continue on this path, you can. You are cut out to do it! But if you don’t want to, for whatever your reasons, you are no less a doctor for leaving.
I know it is so much easier said than done, but please do not belittle yourself. Do not put yourself down because you are unhappy in your job. Just because the job is not suited to you, does not mean you are not suited to the job.
Right. Now that we have that very important note out of the way, we can continue.
I think what I needed to know most when I was considering the idea of leaving, was whether other doctors left, too, or was I just insane for even thinking about it? Then, if they did leave, what did they do next to earn money?
I was so fortunate to come across a blog post by Dr Anjalee Perera at thedisillusionedmedic.com titled, “20 Tips on What to do if You Want to Quit Medicine.” I related to every word, and I found comfort in her blog. It validated my thoughts and feelings, and I felt a little more ready to take the leap. I highly recommend that you check it out for yourself!
When I left Medicine, I was advised by my Career Coach at The Disillusioned Medic to look online for other doctors who left medicine, too and see what they’re doing and if it inspires me. It is a great tool, but I had trouble finding out how these doctors came across their new careers. (Dr Perera does share her journey in her blog, but I was looking for more examples.)
So, this is all to say that I hope this blog can be an additional resource to you. I haven’t found my next BIG thing yet, but I am on a path, and maybe if you follow along with me, in real time-ish, it’ll help you figure out your next step. Obviously, I will have to recount everything that’s happened up until now, but I’ll do my best to have you caught up quickly enough!
Wishing you the best wherever you are on your own journey!
Isabella
